There’s only on problem with it.

“When I do get away for a couple of days, I get bored. I can never win,” he said.

“If I could bottle that feeling of closing a car door and travelling away, I could make a lot of money.

“It’s something I (never thought I would miss)... the madness of children crawling up the walls or hitting me in the testes.”

Hughes is touring Victoria in short spurts with Bendigo, Ballarat and Geelong his next three stops.

The veteran comedian will visit Portland and hometown Warrnambool in July.

“I can’t remember the last time I was in Bendigo. It was quite a while ago,” he said.

“My memory is s***house. I haven’t done a proper show there for years. It was more than five, maybe 10.”

And while Hughes recalls the old buildings and gold rush-look of Bendigo, it is the “Paris of Victoria” he is eager to get back to.

“I joke a lot about Warrnambool and when I was growing up, Geelong was exotic,” he said.

“There are some fond memories of (Geelong’s) performing arts centre and Mum still lives in Warrnambool, so that will be a good homecoming.”

Hughes is enjoying being back on the comedy circuit after leaving his regular Nova radio show at the end of last year and signing off from Channel 10 program The Project earlier this year.

“It’s definitely what I wanted,” he said.

“I’m happy to be travelling around doing stand-up in different cities.

“I got sick of meetings. Between radio in the morning and TV at night, it was about six meetings a day.

“I’m a patient guy and am happy to listen to ideas but I’d had enough of it.”

Highlights of life without TV or radio shows has meant improved sleeping habits.

“I’m really enjoying it. I slept in until 8.30 this morning, which is something I haven’t done for years,” he said.

“I normally just walk around in a daze with children hanging off me.”

Hughes’ new tour is called Pointless and will take him around Australia and back to the UK during 2014.

He speaks on anything that is happening in life - from a Packer punch-up to life with three small children.

“Stand-up is something I never stopped doing. I was out on stage at least once a week, so I never lost the skill or the art,” he said.

“We’re almost halfway through the year and I’ve done 150 gigs already.

“Being able to do it every night means I can come up with an idea and hone it.

“If something happens during the day and I think, ‘f*** that’s funny’ I can turn it into solid material.”