FORMAL education about sexuality in our society is missing something important, a Bendigo sexologist believes.
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Society of Australian Sexologists Victorian president, Dr Linda Kirkman said programs offered in schools often focused on the biological or clinical aspects of sex, like sexually transmitted infections and the forms and functions of reproductive systems.
The social and emotional aspects of a person's sexuality were often less prevalent.
"As a sex therapist, so much of the work I do is communication," Dr Kirkman said.
She and central Victorian occupational therapist Rose Broadway are seeking to encourage a shift in the way people approach sexuality and developing and maintaining healthy relationships.
The duo has developed a program intended to help increase people's safety and wellbeing in relationships, both with themselves and others.
Increasing communication skills is one of the key objectives of 'Growing up human'.
Dr Kirkman and Ms Broadway are also seeking to enhance people's understanding of gender, sexuality, and peer and family relationships.
Sexuality is not about who you have sex with, or how often you have it. Sexuality is about your sexual feelings, thoughts, attractions and behaviours towards other people.
- Better Health Channel
They last week presented a sample of their program at the SexRurality Conference, a two-day event in Creswick.
While most of the presenters covered clinical or biological aspects of sexuality, Dr Kirkman and Ms Broadway invited audience members to take a moment for meditation, and to share their experiences of sexuality education.
"It was really well received," Dr Kirkman said.
The six-week program was initially designed with primary school-aged children and a parent or carer in mind.
"What makes it absolutely flexible for multiple age groups is the principles are all the same," Dr Kirkman said.
The program is centred around equity, equality and being sex-positive.
It approaches those themes by helping people learn how to navigate feelings and harness empathy.
Developing people's understanding of safety and consent, and the skills needed to create those environments, is another of the program's key aims.
Participants are encouraged to consider what constitutes a safe environment, both emotionally and physically.
They are also given skills to assist with critical thinking, such as stopping and taking a breath, then observing before proceeding.
Dr Kirkman said the idea of spontaneity was often something people raised in the context of sex and sexuality.
She said there were definite benefits to having had a conversation about what they, and their partner, liked and desired.
"Not everybody is confident to do it or feels like they can," Dr Kirkman said.
She said the long-term effects of feeling unable to communicate about sexuality included a sense of isolation, loneliness, misunderstanding and having fundamental needs that weren't being met.
Dr Kirkman said relationships that otherwise might have had a really good chance of being successful could become dysfunctional.
Quoting the World Health Organisation, Dr Kirkman said: "Sexual health is more than the absence of disease."
The World Health Organisation defined sexual health as a state of physical, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality.
"It requires a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence," it said.
For more information about the program, click here.
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