For the past few weeks, a broadcast advertisement has been encouraging us to experience a performance at the “Yalumbra” theatre.
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Bendigo people spent about a year getting used to the proper name for our new theatre, and DTM believes it’s now embedded in our ears. Ulumbarra. Uh-lum-bruh.
So why would an ad for an artistic show now say it as if it was a South Australian wine company with a bit of extra “aaah” in it?
These things are important. Sure, Australian English evolves all the time, but we don’t need to let it out romping around all on its own. There may be a generation of kids who will now suspect the theatre has a naming rights sponsor.
And those same little kiddies will no doubt also think you pronounce the word “kilogram” as “kyuh”. You know what we’re talking about. It’s from the Gatling-gun fast TV advertisements for a Kangaroo Flat firm.
“Zing zing … por’s’sages f’ni-ne-ni a kya.” The words are so compacted the ads carry subtitles: “Pork sausages five ninety nine a kilogram.”
Next Gen will think you pronounce anything ending in 99 (and don’t they all?) as ni-ne-ni.
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Down The Mall’s language investigation team also reports a sudden rise in Australia of the Invading K. Somethink. Anythink. It has been noted in the UK and America, but it’s gaining ground here quickly and not just among poorly edumacated people. We heard it this week from one of the big bank chiefs appearing before the Royal Commission.
It was like listening to Sergeant Schultz from Hogan’s Heroes. It’s as though, having dropped a G, people fumbled around in the mental filing cabinet, found a spare K and thought: That’ll do.
The Beatles were once accused of a Stray K in the beautiful song Something In The Way She Moves. There’s a lovely story about this being discussed on radio at the time.
“Have you heard that odd thing in Somethink In The Way She Moves?”
“Sorry, I don’t like anythink by The Beatles.”
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There’s been a lot of discussion in Bendigo this week of stock thefts and how to guard against them.
DTM was at an early morning meeting this week when the subject came up.
A chap who’s big in the pig industry ended the discussion by rising to his feet and announcing:
“We don’t have much trouble with stock thefts in the pig industry because the crooks know the livestock will always squeal on them.”
The groans could be heard in three postcodes simultaneously.
