This is an observation made by Dr Justin Coulson, an author and expert visiting Bendigo on Thursday for a series of workshops, one of which maps out 21 days to a happier family.

“It’s just going to be fun. It will be a great night where we will explore the different ways that we can make our families happier,” he said.

“It’s not that families aren’t happy. But we could all be happier from time to time – whether it’s making mornings magic, getting more night-time nurture, setting more effective limits with our kids or simply having more fun with our families.”

Related: Locally created Get Happier School will help more children drive for happiness

So why, when all is said and done, are many parents somewhat serious around their children?

“Research tells us being a parent does not make us happy. In fact our happiness levels drop when we have children,” Dr Coulson said.

“They continue to drop until kids become teenagers. At that point they plummet.”

It turns out that children are lousy sources for parental happiness.

“They are wonderful for providing meaning and they give us tremendous peak experiences,” Dr Coulson said.

“But they also give us plenty of challenges.”

Those challenges, of course, could range from sleepless nights and potty training through, as children get older, to problems at school, drugs and other parental headaches.

Dr Coulson said navigating those challenges was rewarding. That was why we so often looked back at experiences and said “of course that made me happy”.

Dr Coulson has been invited to Bendigo by CatholicCare Sandhurst, which runs workshops, school programs and sessions with parents to help support happier and healthier family life.

The group’s family and relationship services team leader Narelle Williams said too often local parents were forced to travel to Melbourne to see leading experts speak.

“We find parents are very interested in these topics. They want as much help as they can get to become better parents,” she said.

She said many people were navigating the complexities of parenthood and feeling societal pressures to ensure a happy, healthy and balanced family life.

“We want to show parents they are not alone,” she said.

Dr Coulson would present a second workshop aimed at professionals, including those in welfare and education.

“We are going to talk about this increasing challenge around helping create a respectful society, particularly with boys respecting women,” Dr Coulson said.

Both seminars take place at the Capital Theatre on Thursday 22 March. The Positive Solutions for Professionals and Parents session takes place from 4pm-6pm and the 21 Days to a Happier Family session goes from 7pm-9pm. 

Tickets can be purchased through the Capital.

For more information on Dr Coulson’s work visit his website.