Animals in peril, hoax calls and menacing barbecues are part of a wide range of just under 3000 jobs attended annually by local Country Fire Authority crews.
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Government data reveals since 2009, CFA crews have averaged 2980 jobs per year, including attending a hoax call or false alarm, on average, once every three days.
Animal rescues, as seen on the silver screen, do happen, but are extremely rare – with an average of seven jobs a year.
CFA District 2 operations officer Mick Lavery said it was generally a lot of dogs and cats “stuck everywhere”.
“It’s not always out of the trees, they can get stuck in drains,” he said.
Uncontrollable barbecues are more common, but also quite irregular in the grand scheme of things.
Firefighters attend, on average, 20 rogue barbecue incidents in the region each year, which was mainly due to poorly-maintained equipment, Mr Lavery said.
“Make sure it’s (barbecue) in a safe condition before you use it,” he said.
A good portion of CFA crews’ time is spent cleaning up public mess – namely abandoned outside rubbish, refuse or waste fires.
Twice a week local crews, on average, attended fires relating to rubbish refuse and people burning off their properties.
However, structure fires, emergency incidents, including road accidents, and planned burns are the most frequent jobs completed by CFA paid staff and volunteers.
Grass fires are far more frequent in the region than forest fires, with crews attending 63.57, on average, every 12 months.
Mr Lavery said the number of false alarms had decreased over the years because of improvements in the maintenance of smoke alarms.
Hoax calls would generally spike during school holidays and were a strain on resources, according to Mr Lavery, who urged people to discontinue the practice.
“Someone’s house could be burning at Kangaroo Flat and we’re at a hoax call at Epsom or White Hills, it will take us a long time to get to it,” he said.
“It really takes us away from our core duty.”
Forest or wood fires greater than one hectare were very rare over the past nine years across the district, with just 16, while grass fires totalled 445.
“Early detection of the forest fires helps, as do planned burns,” Mr Lavery said.
Forest Fire Management Victoria Assistant Chief Fire Officer, Scott Falconer, said 7308 hectares were treated with preemptive measures in the Loddon Mallee region from July 2016 – June 2017.
Local fire management crews did more slashing and mowing (3759ha) than planned burns over the past year.