Patrick Holmes isn’t one to feel sorry for himself.
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The Kiwi jockey, who now calls Bendigo home, has had more lows than highs in the past 10 years, but he refuses to let his past wear him down.
Rather than ponder what might have been, Holmes counts himself lucky.
“I’ve made a few bad decisions, but I have no regrets,’’ Holmes said this week.
“Things could be worse… I’m pretty lucky, really.”
Things could have been much worse for Holmes.
In 2009, he was involved in a car crash in New Zealand. He was the passenger of a car driven by his good friend Darren Tyquin.
Holmes walked away from the crash with bruises and a cut to the back of his head, but Tyquin was killed.
Tyquin, a racecaller and mentor to Holmes, had played a huge role in getting his riding career back on track.
“I hit rock bottom after that for two to three years,’’ Holmes admitted.
“Darren was a great friend and he was looking after all my rides. I was struggling before he took over organising my rides and at one stage there with his help I rode 20 winners in a month. He was very astute.
“Physically I was sore for only a couple of months, but mentally I didn’t handle it well. I couldn’t talk to anyone about it and I wasn’t too good.
“Thank God I’m here, but I still miss Darren. I know he’d be proud that I’m going well now.”
Holmes had been one of New Zealand’s best apprentices. He rode more than 200 winners, including a Group One victory, but the lure of party life got the better of him.
“I was very lucky when I was an apprentice in New Zealand to be associated with Stephen and Trevor McKee of Sunline fame,’’ Holmes said.
“I had a great couple of years, but then my weight got a hold of me and I went off the rails there for a bit.
“I then was lucky enough to join forces with (trainer) Shaun Ritchie, the strapper of Bonecrusher. He’d only just moved back to New Zealand from Sydney at the time.
“He only had a small team, but we were lucky enough to get a horse called Magic Cape, who we went on to win our first Group One race with (Two Thousand Guineas at Riccarton).
“After I finished my apprenticeship I had a successful first season, but I lost my way again.
“I was young, I had too much money and I enjoyed the party life too much.
“I was burning the candle at both ends too much.
“I was trying to keep my weight down and then at the same time I wanted to hang out with my mates and party.
“Something had to give… and it was my riding that suffered.”
Holmes credited Tyquin for helping getting his career back on track, but the fatal crash that claimed his friend’s life also threatened to kill off Holmes’ riding career.
“I was probably drinking everyday there at one point,’’ Holmes said.
“I’d be out partying all night and eating the wrong foods. It made it very hard to keep my weight down.
“I went right off the rails there for a while.
“I had to do something (to change it) because I had nothing else to fall back on. I’d been riding since I was 15, so I didn’t know anything else.”
Holmes made the bold decision to leave New Zealand and head to Sydney to ride trackwork for leading trainer Chris Waller.
“I knew Chris after riding a little bit for him when I was an apprentice,’’ Holmes said.
“I enjoyed getting the chance to ride some very nice horses in trackwork, but it wasn’t the same as riding in races. I missed race riding and I wanted to get back into it.”
Holmes made another move, this time to Queensland, where he rejoined the race riding ranks.
He enjoyed some success in a three-year stint, including riding nine winners in the space of a month.
Holmes admitted the relaxed Queensland lifestyle didn’t help his attempts to keep his weight down.
He made another tough call in a bid to get the most out of his riding – he moved to Sutton Grange to join trainer Brent Stanley and the Cloud 9 Thoroughbreds team.
While the move to Sutton Grange didn’t work out, relocating to central Victoria provided Holmes with the opportunity to meet Bendigo trainers, including leading trainer Shaun Dwyer.
“Shaun (Dwyer) asked me for a while to come to Bendigo and I finally decided to make the move,’’ Holmes said.
“It’s probably the best decision I’ve made in 10 years. I’m really enjoying it here. I love the place.
“The people are great and the trainers here have been really supportive. From the little trainers through to the bigger trainers… I’m getting a go with all of them.”
Holmes feels as though he has his mojo back.
Three winners in the past month – all for local trainers – has lifted the 29-year-old’s confidence.
“Shaun (Dwyer) has a nice filly called Savaju that I won on here a couple of weeks ago,’’ Holmes said.
“Hopefully, she’s going to be running on Bendigo Cup day. She has the potential to maybe head to races like the Queensland Oaks next year.
“Shaun’s a very good trainer and he’s been very patient with her. I’m really looking forward to riding her again.”
Holmes is determined not to waste his second chance. The party boy days are over.
“I still enjoy a quiet drink with my mates, but I’m 110 per cent dedicated to riding,’’ he said.
“I need to keep my weight down so that comes before being out partying.
“I’m happy to be chilling at home now and have an early night, so that I’m refreshed and ready to ride the next morning.
“I’m only about to turn 30, but I’ve been through, and seen, a lot for someone that age.
“I’m keen to make the most of this opportunity I have now. If I can do that, I’ll be happy.”