Redesdale cancer retreat nearing completion
BENDIGO builder Paul Gray pulls two laser cut signs from the back of his car.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
They’re a sign his labour of love, a retreat for people living with the challenges of breast cancer, is almost complete.
Kez’s Hideaway should be set to accommodate its first guests before mid-year.
What started as an idea from Mr Gray’s late wife Kerri now has freshly painted walls and ceilings, polished concrete floors, and an enviably spacious kitchen.
It’s astonishingly large windows frame views of Redesdale, 20 acres of which were donated to the project by the Campbell family.
When it’s done, Mr Gray will gift the project to the OTIS Foundation. It will be one of four properties they can use year-round.
“It’s a house that will provide accommodation for more than 100 families a year,” Mr Gray said.
“I know Kez’d be proud.”
Mrs Gray suggested late in her battle with cancer her husband should build a house to help the OTIS Foundation.
“I don’t think she ever thought I’d do this,” Mr Gray said.
“I think she thought I’d do something they might be able to auction off, or something like that… but this is something that will be around with Kez’s name on it, forever.
“It’s a legacy I’ve been able to create so she’ll never be forgotten.”
Mrs Gray was a month out from her 39th birthday when cancer finally claimed her on March 10, 2011.
Oddly enough, OTIS founder Dr Andrew Barling lost his wife Judy Burley exactly eleven years earlier. “We had a connection straight away,” Mr Gray said.
Kerri fought the cancer off for four years.
“Kez was very positive and was going to beat it,” Mr Gray said. But he knew they were “up for a battle” when Mrs Gray was diagnosed with secondary breast cancer.
He arranged his business, Paul Gray Builders, in a way that allowed him time to care for his wife. Then the family started going on more holidays.
“Knowing how much getting away with the family meant with her, to have those times with us and those memories… that’s what everyone’s going to do here,” Mr Gray said.
The couple’s children, Darcy and Emily, were 8 and 11 years old respectively at that stage.
Mr Gray had their family holidays in mind when he created Kez’s Hideaway.
The windows highlight the importance of a change in scenery. “It’s all about outlook,” he said.
The 33 square metres of living space were designed around a central hub of communal living areas, with two ‘offshoots’ on either side. One area was designed for the patient, and on the other side of the house, ample space for the rest of the family.
“It’s a hub, but they can get away,” Mr Gray said.
“The kids can still do their things. If Mum or Dad is down in the bedroom and still feeling crook from chemo, there’s a day bed that Margot Spalding’s made they’ll be able to rest in and come out when they’re ready.”
Mr Gray has been overwhelmed by the support the project has received.
Bendigo businesses have been eager to get involved, and at a fraction of the retail price. Mr Gray said he had two A4 sheets full of the names of people that had helped. Jimmy Possum, Alan and Margot Spalding’s business, is donating furniture.
The project’s website has a wishlist for anybody else keen to pitch in.
Mr Gray said the project was being completed for under a third of what it would usually cost.
“I just can’t thank people enough,” he said. ”I’ve lost Kez, I’ve built this and I’ve made some amazing friends along the way.”
‘Never ending’ demand for Bendigo cancer charity
IN the fifteen years since it was founded, The OTIS Foundation has grown from a property in Mandurang to more than 30 nationwide.
Much of that expansion has been in the past year.
“We’ve been on a mission,” general manager Rachel Mason said.
Eighteen properties were on the books at the start of 2015. That number is now up to 31.
“We’re hoping to get to 38 around the middle of the year… next year we’re supposed to go to 54,” Mrs Mason said.
The Bendigo-based charity provides free retreats for people affected by breast cancer and was inspired by Judy Burley, who died of breast cancer in 2000.
Mrs Burley had secondary breast cancer when she and husband Dr Andrew Barling, a Bendigo surgeon, relocated to Mandurang and built their dream home.
OTIS marketing and communications manager Carlie Ryan said the property’s beauty and serenity helped Mrs Burley work through her situation.
“She said to Andrew at that point, ‘Every woman should have this opportunity’,” Ms Ryan said.
The OTIS Foundation marketing and communications manager Carlie Ryan talks about the charity.
Dr Barling realised his late wife’s dream by offering the family home, Bramare, as a place where people affected by breast cancer could take a short break with their loved ones.
He also built two neighbouring villas: St Jude’s, named after Mrs Burley; and St Hannah’s, after her great aunt, who also had breast cancer. So the foundation started.
The majority of OTIS properties are now donated to the foundation by people with holiday houses.
Canberra woman Elspeth Humphries, now an OTIS board member, started the trend by offering the use of her property in Thredbo when it was vacant.
“That idea became the way forward and gave us a lot more options,” Mrs Mason said.
OTIS now operates in five states and aims to have properties in Western Australia and Tasmania in the near future.
“Providing as many nights of accommodation as we can is our core business, so as long as we can raise the funds to match it, we just want to keep growing,” Mrs Mason said.
“There’s something like 17,000 people diagnosed with breast cancer each year and if we offer close to 4000 nights this year, we’re still only assisting a small portion of the people that are dealing with those challenges.”
Although the properties are provided to OTIS and its guests free of charge, Ms Ryan said it costs the foundation about $50 a night to accommodate a group.
“We cover the cost of cleaning and linen and utilities,” she said.
OTIS is also fundraising for Kez’s Hideaway in Redesdale.
Gift vouchers for a night’s stay in an OTIS retreat will be available for purchase ahead of Mother’s Day.
Author Lyndsey Clark will also donate profits from the sale of her children’s picture book, My Mummy Has Cancer, to the charity.
Mrs Mason thanked the community for its generous support.
Signature fundraising events such as the raffle and annual golf day last Saturday raised a combined total of about $50,000.
Breast cancer survivor ‘just needed to get away’
OPENING the guest book at an OTIS Foundation retreat was a “huge turning point” in Strathfieldsaye mother Karlee Thorpe’s battle against breast cancer.
At 36, she had been diagnosed with an especially aggressive form of the disease.
Before her week at the Alyonah retreat at Daylesford, Mrs Thorpe had yet to encounter many young women in a similar position.
That guest book was proof she was not alone.
“I was reading all of these other people that were going through exactly what I was going through,” she said.
“Young kids had drawn pictures in there, there were messages from loved ones ... messages from people who had actually gone through cancer themselves.”
Mrs Thorpe said the retreat gave her the strength she needed to keep fighting.
“It’s just a getaway at one of the worst times of your life,” she said.
The OTIS Foundation will this year provide about 4000 nights of accommodation to people living with the challenges of breast cancer.
Marketing and communications manager Carlie Ryan said the true ‘OTIS gift’ was the change in perspective.
“It’s often the first positive in a long series of negatives,” she said.
Strange coincidences
Mrs Thorpe found out about the foundation in a “weird” way, having worked for Bendigo Bank when it formed a partnership with OTIS.
“Believe it or not, part of my job back then was to raise awareness through our Bendigo branches, never in a million years thinking that 12 or 13 years later I’d be staying at one of those retreats,” she said.
She was reminded of the foundation’s work by a breast care nurse, who included a brochure in a goodie pack.
“I couldn’t believe it,” she said.
Her cancer diagnosis was also a shock – although few people expect to hear those words come out of a doctor’s mouth.
“I was definitely not feeling sick. I was probably the fittest and healthiest I had ever been in my life,” Mrs Thorpe said.
“I had a husband and two children who were seven and eight at the time, and we were running our own business.”
The only indication something was amiss was an strange sensation in her breast, which she felt for the first time on a lazy day, sitting on the couch.
“I scratched the itch and found a lump,” Mrs Thorpe said.
The battle
Chemotherapy. Radiation. Bilateral mastectomy. Hormone treatment.
It’s no wonder Mrs Thorpe needed to get away.
The cancer had already moved to all but one of her lymph nodes when it was detected.
“So because of that, I had all the treatments thrown at me,” she said.
“Losing the breasts was probably the easiest part. Losing my hair was horrible, because I looked sick then.
“Suddenly the kids weren’t keen on mum dropping them off at school and things like that, and people look at you differently.”
Now, more than two years since her diagnosis, Mrs Thorpe calls herself “cancer free.”
“But in my oncologist’s words ... ‘There is no evidence of cancer in your body’,” she said.
That’s not to say everything’s back to normal. One of Mrs Thorpe’s treatments will continue for a decade in the form of daily tablets.
Then there are the side effects of the cancer treatment, and the worry about getting cancer again.
“They’ve told me there’s a 20 to 30 percent chance it will return. I just figure that’s a 70 to 80 percent chance it’s not going to,” Mrs Thorpe said.
“I’m just trying to keep fit and healthy and doing everything I can to stop it coming back.”
She said her family had been an incredible source of love and support.
“This is the thing with breast cancer, it’s so much more than just the person going through it,” she said.
“Your loved ones go through this and watch you looking and feeling so sick as well.
“So it’s good that you can basically take the amount of people the house sleeps [to an OTIS retreat].”