LIKE most people in the world, I’ve watched that shark attack on surfer Mick Fanning about 1350 times this week. It fascinates me, but not for reasons you might think.
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I reckon it’s an example of modern approach to news. An event is really only considered newsworthy by the global TV networks if there’s actual footage. No pictures? No story.
The real story should go like this: “Beaut Aussie bloke who spends his life in the sea has a close encounter with a shark: mate comes to his aid. No-one hurt”.”
But… it’s a shark. And there are genuine moving images. The world was mesmerised.
We know our fear of sharks, spiders, snakes are not rational and have nothing to do with the real level of threat. A lot of information is available on this.
It has been proven that in Australia, you are much more likely to die from falling out of bed, falling off your office chair than being killed by a shark, but do we shudder at the sight of an office chair (on Mondays maybe) or loathe the idea of a bed?
I reckon a symbol of fear and loathing should be – the humble ladder. It’s the leading cause of accidental death among older males. Last year more than 3500 blokes were hospitalised after falling from a ladder. The great majority in and around the home.
Among the many thousands of things likely to kill you more than sharks, according to the Australian Bureau of Statistics are: caterpillars (yep, dangerous little things), hot-water taps, being bitten by a human (much more likely than a dog), an exploding barbecue gas cylinder.
You are statistically nine times more likely to die in a horse-drawn vehicle than a train.
Just as many died in a bathtub submersion as were killed in storms.
What about this? You are equally likely to die from bumping into someone in the street as from an attack in the sea.
More died from falling off their bed than falling from a tall cliff or building.
So, the next time you go into work cue the duh-duh duh-duh music from Jaws as you approach your evil swivel chair. Break out into a sweat at the thought of the waste-paper bin. Do not take your eyes off the stationery cabinet. And as for staplers, well, enough said.
Death of 1000 kinds lurks in the cleaning cupboard. Mops! Buckets! Gasp… chemicals. Pointy things. Blunt things!
And, if someone’s filming it on their smartphone, you just know you’re about to become global news.
I have to agree with the comments from Steve Backshall, presenter of the BBC TV series Deadly 60, who said the Fanning footage was a PR disaster… for sharks.
