A GROUP of us had a presentation this week on the costs and options of aged care in Bendigo.
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Yeah, yeah, it’ll happen to you too one day, so enough with the insults.
We were told of DAPs and CAS and ATIL and all sorts of fun stuff, and the $50 daily fee rate, the accommodation cost, the six-figure bond, the fees for looking in the mirror twice. The forms!
Having just recently been through this in our family, we’ve been gob-smacked at how much some families have to raise to make sure their beloved relos get good care. But we did some calculations and DTM has some much more entertaining and cost-effective solutions.
Pizza heaven
In our family’s situation, the amount that had to be raised for care and accommodation for one year was well, to put it mildly, staggering.
We calculated that if we’d gone to a fairly modest motel and rented a room for, say, $100 a night and then kept sending out for home delivered Chinese and pizzas, there would have been enough to stay there for six years and one month.
Think about it. No power or water bills, land tax, cleaning costs, tea and coffee, a couple of bickies a day, TV maintenance.
Head for the high seas
But there was a better alternative, which DTM swears is true.
Many years ago, we were on a comfy but not lavish South Pacific Cruise and one night we met a charming elderly American lady who was holding court at the bar and had everyone in fits of laughter.
She was describing all the cruises and fun she’d been on... in the past year.
She had worked out that it was financially better for her to spend her final years on the high seas taking one cruise immediately after another, with the cruise companies offering huge discounts for repeat business.
So DTM did the figures on this and without looking too hard, we found one company offering cruises for an average of $71 a night.
That includes accommodation, meals, entertainment, cleaning, laundry, a stream of constant companions, medical aid and even – at the end – a quick service and a burial at sea.
We estimated that the amount we had to find would have kept our dear departed on board for about 10 years!
Pitched battle
Ah, the good old days often weren’t.
We came across a 1904 report of Bendigo Miners League football match at Eaglehawk’s Canterbury Park between the Carlisle and New Moon teams which ended in uproar.
The Melbourne Argus reported that Umpire Campbell had awarded a free kick when the offending player slammed the ball into the umpire who was then charged by another New Moon player and was sent crashing to the ground. And that’s when it started to get serious.
The crowd invaded the oval and three police had to escort poor umpire Campbell to safety.
The Bendigo Advertiser reported that months later, the last six minutes of the match were completed and that “Mr Crapp, from Melbourne, acted as umpire".
Not a man to be taken on lightly, we presume.
The Addy mentioned that proceeds were donated to the “Worn-Out Miners’ Fund.”